Pupil of Love,
I drastically need help. I have been involved with this guy for the last two years. I love this man. I am 25 and he is 28 years old. When we first started dating he let me know that he wasn’t looking for anything serious and I told him that was fine. At the time I didn’t want anything serious just getting out of a crazy relationship myself.
We started Netflix and chillin’ some nights. The sex was amazing. After a few months, things got intense and I fell in love. He has met my two kids, my family, and friends who all think he is a good man. I haven’t met anyone on his side. His parents, his kids, not even his friends I have met. When I ask him about it he says he doesn’t want everyone in his business. He says he loves me, but if we are going to take this relationship any further he needs to let me in his life. What do I do?
Confused and Upset,
I understand your confusion and why your upset. It hard giving your best to someone and you don’t get what your giving out in return. Let’s start out with the fifth sentence in your first paragraph and this will truly sum everything up in a nutshell. When you first started dating this man that you have fell in love with, he told you he wasn’t looking for anything serious.
Instead of you taking to heart what he said and acting accordingly, you preceded to give him everything a person would give someone in a relationship.You gave him your time, attention, sex, and he met your family. That is how you treat your man and he made it clear that was not his plan to ever be.
The saying is true, when someone shows and tells you who they are, believe them. When you enter into your next relationship, trust and believe what your significant other tells you. We always think we can change a man’s mind about things. If we show him what he can have, it will make him want it. No, it just makes him take what you are giving him and his mind is still set on not making a commitment.
Next time believe the words that are coming out of his mouth!
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